Slowly but surely

Dad is doing well and was transferred to a rehab facility yesterday, although it wasn't without a fight.  Mom has been waging war over the phone with their insurance company that denied Dad's request for rehabilitation.  I am just as concerned about Mom getting worn down and having health problems as I am about Dad getting better.  

As much progress as Dad has made in 5 days, he is still not able to take care of himself, yet they were ready to send him home yesterday.  Thankfully, Mom found an advocate at the rehab facility where he ended up who helped plead their case to the powers that be.  They basically had to threaten a possible lawsuit if Dad wasn't given the care he needed to get back to his functional self because of the safety issues he deals with at work.  I pray that he can get back to work quickly and have a job waiting for him because it is almost all he talks about.  He's gotta get out of that hospital because he has too much work to do, and they really need him because no one else knows how to run the job.  Those are the types of things he has said every day I have seen him.  He's probably right.  As long as it motivates him to get better quickly.

The Doctors and Mom are impressed with his progress, but Mom is still worried because they haven't found out what cause the stroke.  Understandably, Mom wants to have as many questions answered so they can prevent Dad from having another stroke.  I just pray that Dad won't find himself in the McDonalds drive-thru anymore and take this getting healthier thing seriously.  We are so blessed that he is okay and that the stroke didn't effect his memory.  The part of his brain that was effected controls his reflexes like swallowing & bladder control and organizational skills.  Things look good for an almost full, if not full, recovery. 

Thank you to all who have been praying for Dad and Mom during this time.  As a family, we have seen many little miracles and amazing improvement in Dad's situation and circumstances.  He has wonderful care-givers and Doctors, and many kuddos to Mom's long hours at his side.  She has spent every day at the hospital with Dad, but needs to get back to work.  Now that Dad is 45 minutes away from home Mom is going to have many long, tiring days traveling from home to work to the rehab facility and back home late at night.  We count our blessings that Dad is still here, is healing and had the desire to get well.

Tender Mercies

In the spirit of Valentine's Day yesterday, I've been thinking a lot about all the amazing people in my life that I love and am so thankful for.  I am especially grateful for both sides of my family who have pulled together to support Mom and Dad as they recover from Dad's stroke Saturday night.

It's been really hard for me seeing Dad laid up in the hospital.  Each time I talk to one of my brothers I realize that, a). we can't change what happened so there is no use pining over how Dad was before the stroke and b). things could have been much worse and we still have him here with us.  My husband has the same realist, no-nonsense personality which balances out my tendency to worry and let negative thoughts fester.  I'm thankful for all their voices of reason to help me suck it up and get to work on improving the situation instead of worrying about how bad it could be. 

I had a wonderful talk with Mom last night about the numerous small miracles that have surrounded this entire situation with Dad's stroke.  I am so thankful for many tender mercies that the Lord has seen fit to grant our family at this time.       

These pictures are from yesterday when Dad started to fall asleep.  He was transported across the street for an MRI and worked with the speech therapist that morning, so he was ready for a snooze.  Even so, I didn't see much of his eyes as he kept them shut most of the time.  

I am thankful for the great care Dad is getting at our local hospital.  When Mom, who works at one of the best hospitals around, is impressed with the staff and care Dad is getting, I know he is in good hands.

I am thankful Dad wasn't driving or home alone for the day when he had his stroke.

I am thankful for the power of prayer.  We have already seen the benefit of faithful family and friends prayers for Dad's health and recovery.

I am thankful that Tom and Mom were able to get him to the hospital as fast as they did.

I am thankful for such loving and selfless family.  Thank you Ben and Heather for making the long drive down here to support and comfort my Mom and Dad.  It has meant so much to us all.

I am thankful that Mom is also in good spirits.  I worry about her just as much as Dad.  I know that she is being comforted and strengthened by her faith in Heavenly Father's love for her and Dad.

I am thankful Dad still has his sense of humor.  The part of his brain that was effected by the stroke effects personality which means it could have turned him into a cantankerous, belligerent, old grump.  We are so grateful he is still Dad, if not a little more child-like version.  He is willing to do what the nurses and Docs ask him to, and wants to work hard to get out of that bed for good.  He keeps the staff entertained with his humor, sometimes proving that he doesn't have much inhibition by saying inappropriate things.  ;)

I am thankful for the fast progress Dad is making in his recovery.  He looks so much better than 24 hours after the stroke.  My Man and I went to see him Sunday night, exactly 24 hours after, and it was all I could do to hold back tears.  I wasn't even very good at that.  He could barely open his right eye, he could talk but not very well, he couldn't swallow, and his entire left side was weak and droopy.  It's hard to see a parent slow down, but when it happened so suddenly it really knocked the wind out of me.

I just got back from a quick visit to the hospital on Dad's 3rd day after the stroke and he looks so good.  I walked in to find Dad sitting up and eating!  His meals are blended up hospital food and thickened liquid, but he can swallow better and started his first day back on food.  The best part about seeing Dad today was that he had both eyes wide open and was watching Fox News, his favorite.  Mom said he walked down the hall with the help of a walker, and has been working hard on exercises to strengthen his facial muscles.  He wants to get out of that hospital room SO badly.  Every time I go see him he talks about how he needs to get back to work because they need him.  His attitude is positive and the progress he is making is so encouraging.  We are praying that he can make a quick recovery and keep the motivation to improve his health.

My chillies made Grandpa cute cards on Sunday that we took over that night.  He could barely hold them and didn't open his eyes at all to look at them.  Today we took another picture on Mom's camera where Dad is holding the pictures and trying his best to smile, eyes wide open.  Thank heaven for small miracles.  I know that our Heavenly Father is watching over Dad and our family.  I have realized in these short 3 days that this is a learning and growing experience for all of us, not just Dad.

When we visited on Sunday, Dad said the Doc asked him if he got his wife anything for Valentine's Day.  Dad said he planned on picking up a box of See's chocolates and maybe flowers on his way home from work on Monday.  In his mind he was going to work the next day.  Monday morning we went to my Man's office to put things back together after painting all Saturday.  I had to stop at the See's right by his office to get Dad that box of soft centers he was going to buy Mom.  When I took Mom lunch at the hospital that afternoon, I gave Dad the box of chocolates to give to Mom.  He said, "that's okay, I'm going to get some tomorrow after work."  I said, "Dad, it is tomorrow and I picked them up for you to save you a trip."  The rest of my stay he kept asking to have a chocolate even though we told him over and over that he couldn't eat until he passed his swallow test.  "Yeah, I will," he replied.  Before I left I leaned over his bed to say goodbye when he asked, "you have that candy?"  "You mean the chocolates, Dad?"  "Yeah, crack open that box.  Let's have some chocolate."  As you can see, his brain is still recovering.  ;)

Nightmare

I have two reoccurring nightmares since being married twelve years ago.  Actually, more like eleven years ago, right before our first born came to live with us.  The first nightmare that I can't seem to escape is some sort of home invasion.  A burly man attacks me while I'm alone at home and I can't get help, or someone barges in the house while I'm alone with the kids.  It creeps me out just thinking about it mostly awake.  My second nightmare, to which I have woken up crying a couple times, is being jolted with the news that my Dad has suffered a catastrophic health crisis like a heart attack and died.  I dreamt these vivid, horrible dreams mostly when I was pregnant, but tonight one of them almost came true.

My Man called me as I was taking a breather at Walmart.  My shopping cart held heart chocolates for the kids to attach to their Valentine's, and I was lazily browsing my way up to the cash register.  He hastily asked if I'd talked to my brother, and that my Dad was at the hospital being checked over because he collapsed at home.  I have believed my dearest Dad's health to be fragile for years, and we all beg him to take better care of himself.  It looks as though he has suffered a stroke, but we don't know the extent yet.  I hope and pray that all is as well as it can possibly be after such an occurrence.

I'm trying to direct all my positive thoughts and prayers to Dad's recovery, but there is part of my personality that won't shut off the negative thoughts.  I've got 31 flavors of what happens next churning around in my head and not many of them are good.  I just saw both my parents today, and mentioned to Mom that the new diet change my Man and I have done feels great and could really help Dad.  I'm not ready to lose a parent.  I'm sure no one really is, so I am praying with all my heart and mind (conscious and subconscious) that Dad recovers and finds the motivation to work his way back to health.  I'm here to help with salad in hand!

Held accountable

My Man is on the fast track to losing weight.  He looks amazing.  He's also got great willpower.  I want to be thinner, but I am having a problem committing.  Not sure why. 

SO, I hereby promise to eat sugar only one day a week. 

Baby steps.

Down with the Mouse King

 When Toby grows up he has one more of those interesting tid-bits of information to share during a get-to-know you game or during small talk with a pretty girl.  ;)  Hopefully, it won't embarrass him to say that he participated in a production of the Nutcracker when he was seven.  We saw his performance as a family last night and Toby did such a great job.

The entire cast and crew of Rachel's Ballet has been up at Oakland late every night from Wednesday to Saturday (and many other nights) to rehearse and perform the Nutcracker on Temple Hill.  Rachel is a friend from our ward at church and asked Toby back in January if he would be willing to participate because they were short on boys.  He is a brave boy, a good sport, and loves to dance, so he said of course he would.  My parents got roped into it too, because Rachel was desperate for couples to dance in the opening party scene.  At least that's what my Dad says, because there is no other way he would be caught dancing on stage.  That and my Mom committed them before telling Dad what exactly it entailed.  He's never going to live down the fancy green handkerchief he waved around the stage during the dance.  ;)

The parentals with dear Marilyn.  She worked magic with the costumes and we had fun during rehearsals.

Even though he complained all the way, I think Dad really did have fun.

This production of the Nutcracker was a free two-night engagement that Rachel wanted to provide to the community so they could bring families to see one of her childhood loves.  I also have a fond memory of seeing the Nutcracker when I was young and wanted to share that with my chillies.  The problem was always that they wouldn't enjoy it at their current young ages for the $50+ a ticket we would have to pay at the San Francisco or San Jose ballet.  I was so glad Rachel asked Toby to be in it and I was happy to help so that we could be a part of this production.  What a wonderful Christmas present right?

Toby's performance this weekend was even more commendable because he has been so sick all week.   As a parent, they asked us to volunteer backstage for one rehearsal and one performance night, so I was also up late with Toby at rehearsal making sure he didn't hack up a lung.  Poor guy.  We got into a routine of taking it easy during rehearsal, going straight to bed by 11:30 or so, sleeping in (him, not me), drinking tons of water, vitamins, eating right, afternoon nap, a dose of Tylenol to keep his lingering fever in check, then back up to Oakland to do it all over again.  He tried hard not to cough onstage, and thankfully, didn't need to worry about any sort of speaking part.  "The show must go on" was uttered a couple times when he just didn't want to do anything.  Despite feeling all-around crappy on Thursday and Friday, he soldiered on and still had a fun weekend.  Rachel told me numerous times how much her and the teachers enjoyed working with Toby because he just has a natural ability to act and good stage presence.  He was a natural leader for the other little soldiers that participated with him.  The battle scene was the cutest part More importantly, he had fun!

Toby's favorites:

Using the popguns during the party scene (to bug the girls).

Being a soldier and shooting the big canon at the naughty mice during the battle scene.

Watching the big girls dance.

A sweet lady from church asking for his autograph after the performance Saturday night (isn't that adorable?!).

Dislikes:
Having Mom put make-up on him.  He could barely stand still long enough for some dark eye shadow and liner.
Being sick and not able to run around with the other boys.

So how did the ballet fair with the rest of the family?  The Littles barely made it through the second act, but loved the first act with the party scene and the big battle between the soldiers and the Mouse King.  Sydney's favorite part was the adorable little sheep and their costumes.  After the performance she kept asking to go see our friend Maya as the sheep.  She would have taken that costume home in a heart beat.  When the gingerbread house and dancers came out I whispered to Sydney, "Look at that pretty gingerbread house!"  She quickly replied, "I want to eat it!"  Logan was a typical uninterested little boy who barely made it through with the help of a couple iTouch games.

We sat in front of friends from our ward, and we Moms joked about how we were going to expose our kids to cultured events even if it kills them.  It almost killed off Logan tonight.  He was shaking with frustration a couple times towards the end. At one point Daddy told Logan to watch the show.  Logan replied back with genuine frustration, "What am I supposed to watch?!"  Jessie liked it, but got a little frumpy because she couldn't see very well.  I'm not sure if my Man enjoyed the night or tolerated it for Toby's sake, but he did like making fun of the prince's costume.  At least he sat through the whole thing and didn't leave after the first act like some friends we know.  Yeah, you know who you are, wimp!

Toby made fast friends with all the girls, as is his way, ;) Here he is with the beautiful Snow Queen.

I was excited to finally see the whole show from the audience instead of snippets from backstage.  It didn't disappoint.  Watching the big girls stuff lambs wool between their sore toes before lacing up those tortuous toe shoes, then move so gracefully onstage was amazing.  The costumes, scenery, and Rachel's ballet students were all so impressive.  A couple times during the performance I reminded myself that this really was a free event.  All around I think it was an awesome experience for our whole family.

Toby met up with his best bud Milo after the first performance.  He was sawing logs about 15 minutes after this picture was taken.  The poor kid was so tired.  Funny story.  When Milo's big sisters found out Toby was in the Nutcracker they were both shocked that Toby's Dad let him participate in a ballet.  Apparently, my Man is too butch to have any son of his dancing on stage.  We both laugh that one son has promise as a dancer and the other wants to be a "cake maker" when he grows up.  We'll see if they change their minds to more 'manly' professions as they grow up.  I don't think we mind either way as long as they are good at what they like to do.  If this weekends performance of the Nutcracker is any indication, Toby could have a future in the performing arts.