Birthday celebration for Dad

What a happy day yesterday!  Mom and Kristy went early yesterday morning to spring Dad from his prison.  He was elated to walk out of the rehab facility to get on with life and healing.  Kristy said she and Mom were busy collecting all the things from his room when they looked around and couldn't find Dad.  He had walked himself down the hall to the elevator while his nurse ran after him to escort him out the front doors, as is protocol.  It has been so hard for Mom to travel up to be with him every day, and Dad got terribly lonely when Mom wasn't there, like during the long nights.  It's going to be great for them to be home.  Dad will continue to have therapists come to the house and also travel for therapy in town, but the long drives and hours apart for Mom and Dad are done.  I plan on spending the days that Mom works over at their house to help out and make sure Dad is okay.  He can get around pretty well with a walker, but he lost most of his strength and stamina.  He came home 20 pounds lighter and our family goal is to help him lose a lot more.  He knows he has to now.

The Doctors and therapists that worked with Dad loved his ever-present whit and were so surprised at how fast he progressed in his recovery.  He came home teasing that he could go to work and function with half his brain tied behind his back.  His speech is much better, he can eat solid food now (a big wahoo!), his facial paralysis is almost unnoticeable, and he is doing all his mental exercises to fix the connections in his brain that were damaged.  Dad speaks so highly of the skilled staff that helped him, and he knows he has a long road back to %100.  We are here to get him there though.  I pray that dear Mom's burdens will be lightened as she is worried about working enough to cover their expenses, and is Dad's main care-giver until he can function be on his own.

Despite all the hard work ahead, we had a happy celebration tonight with Dad at home.  While in the hospital, he would look at the calendar every morning to see what day it was and count how many more days until the big starred date.  His sister Mary, marked yesterday as Freedom Day and Birthday on the calendar in his room, so Dad would have something to look forward to.  We had a great evening celebrating his freedom!

The quickest thing we thought of whipping up for our impromptu dinner was breakfast; sausage, bacon, eggs, waffles, and tons of fruit.  I know, it wasn't the best meal for those of us trying to lose weight, but we were celebrating.  Dad kept saying that this was the best meal he had had in weeks.  Of course, anything beats pureed food stuck into molds to form it back into the shape it started in.  Breakfast for dinner topped with a piece of chocolate birthday cake for dessert made Dad a happy man.

One of the things Dad has to practice is puckering his lips.  Since his first week in the hospital he said he was going to watch the "Littlest Mermaid" when he got home because he remembered Sebastian puckering his lips in the movie.  "You gotta bot your eyes like 'dis.  You gotta pucker up your lips like 'dis," we all recited together in the family room as we watched the Little Mermaid while eating birthday cake.  Dad wasn't kidding, he had Mom put on the movie and sat there with the kids until that part came.  Then he practiced with all his might to pucker his lips.  He still can't quite get there, but at least he is moving the left side of his face much better than several weeks ago.

We said a late good-bye and gave Dad a huge squeeze on behalf of everyone that has been praying for his return home.  God is good!  He answers prayers, and seeing Dad doing better and at home is a huge answer to many prayers!

Happy Birthday, dear Dad!

P.S.  The chocolate cake looked and smelled delicious, but I was strong and didn't have any.  Not even a sneak off Sydney's barely-eaten piece.  I can do this.  I think I can, I think I can , I think I can.......

Sunny Sunday

Sunday afternoons have become go-visit-Grandpa day in Oaktown, so that we can catch up on our week and give Dad some much needed company.  Dad was in good spirits and excited to share the goodies with us that his sister, Mary, brought with her when she visited this past week.  It wasn't a coincidence that Aunt Mary called "just to say Hi and thinking of you" the night Dad had his stroke. They are close and it meant a lot to Dad that his sister came to visit.  Thank you Ron and Mary for supporting Dad by coming here for a couple days.  I know it helped him feel loved and lightened his spirits.  Even though he has a rigorous therapy schedule during the day, he gets so lonely back in his room.  I know having family visit is the highlight of his days.  We talked and laughed together in a quiet room set aside for visits on Dad's floor at the rehab facility on this sunny Sunday afternoon.  The kids munched away on treats, and provided ever-present entertainment while we heard about what Dad did the last week to wake up his brain after the stroke.    

Showing off his hand exercises as we first arrived

Mom tells us the Doctors are encouraged by Dad's quick recovery so far.  His left-sided paralysis is decreasing, and his smile is getting much better.  Mom runs him through all the facial exercises he can do to retrain those muscles, and he practices swallowing, puckering his lips, raising his eyebrows, and smiling to wake up that part of his brain that moves those facial muscles.  He is much more alert and aware of what's going on in the room, as opposed to the first week where he just kept talking about the same things over and over and slept a lot.  We could tell he was stressed about getting back to work and life after a couple days in the hospital, yet he didn't realize it wouldn't be possible for awhile.  Yeah, that first week was hard to see my always on-the-go Dad laid up with all the desire, but no possibility of getting out of that bed right then.  

J showing Gramps her robot beetle built up from tiny pieces

My Man with his girls.  This picture reminds me- almost everything I have read about thumb-sucking says you have to just ignore it until the kid is ready to give it up.  I can't!  It drives me nuts.  What to do........???

I knew Dad was coming back to us when he sat us all down for a talk.  He told us the target date the Docs set for him to come home was March 10th, his birthday.  Then he made us all promise to help Mom as much as possible because she was working so hard already going to work and tending to Dad's needs.  He joked with my boys that they could scrub the bathrooms at his house to help Grandma and call it a "Pee-pee party."  He is still a little uninhibited and the boys think it's hilarious that he talks about that sort of stuff that they are not allowed to say in front of girls.  

This whole situation has forced me to think of the possibility of losing my parents, the possibility of my kids losing their parents, lots of uncomfortable things that one doesn't choose to think of often.  I've had the prompting lately to dot the i's and cross those t's with regard to our financial planning, life insurance, our will, etc.  We want to change some things and it's time to do it.  Yesterday.

Above all, I thank God for sparing Dad's life to be with us here on Earth longer.  I'm selfish that way.  I want my parents around to spend time with me and my kids for as long as possible. We are so blessed that Dad is still here, doing well and on the road to recovery!

Slowly but surely

Dad is doing well and was transferred to a rehab facility yesterday, although it wasn't without a fight.  Mom has been waging war over the phone with their insurance company that denied Dad's request for rehabilitation.  I am just as concerned about Mom getting worn down and having health problems as I am about Dad getting better.  

As much progress as Dad has made in 5 days, he is still not able to take care of himself, yet they were ready to send him home yesterday.  Thankfully, Mom found an advocate at the rehab facility where he ended up who helped plead their case to the powers that be.  They basically had to threaten a possible lawsuit if Dad wasn't given the care he needed to get back to his functional self because of the safety issues he deals with at work.  I pray that he can get back to work quickly and have a job waiting for him because it is almost all he talks about.  He's gotta get out of that hospital because he has too much work to do, and they really need him because no one else knows how to run the job.  Those are the types of things he has said every day I have seen him.  He's probably right.  As long as it motivates him to get better quickly.

The Doctors and Mom are impressed with his progress, but Mom is still worried because they haven't found out what cause the stroke.  Understandably, Mom wants to have as many questions answered so they can prevent Dad from having another stroke.  I just pray that Dad won't find himself in the McDonalds drive-thru anymore and take this getting healthier thing seriously.  We are so blessed that he is okay and that the stroke didn't effect his memory.  The part of his brain that was effected controls his reflexes like swallowing & bladder control and organizational skills.  Things look good for an almost full, if not full, recovery. 

Thank you to all who have been praying for Dad and Mom during this time.  As a family, we have seen many little miracles and amazing improvement in Dad's situation and circumstances.  He has wonderful care-givers and Doctors, and many kuddos to Mom's long hours at his side.  She has spent every day at the hospital with Dad, but needs to get back to work.  Now that Dad is 45 minutes away from home Mom is going to have many long, tiring days traveling from home to work to the rehab facility and back home late at night.  We count our blessings that Dad is still here, is healing and had the desire to get well.

Tender Mercies

In the spirit of Valentine's Day yesterday, I've been thinking a lot about all the amazing people in my life that I love and am so thankful for.  I am especially grateful for both sides of my family who have pulled together to support Mom and Dad as they recover from Dad's stroke Saturday night.

It's been really hard for me seeing Dad laid up in the hospital.  Each time I talk to one of my brothers I realize that, a). we can't change what happened so there is no use pining over how Dad was before the stroke and b). things could have been much worse and we still have him here with us.  My husband has the same realist, no-nonsense personality which balances out my tendency to worry and let negative thoughts fester.  I'm thankful for all their voices of reason to help me suck it up and get to work on improving the situation instead of worrying about how bad it could be. 

I had a wonderful talk with Mom last night about the numerous small miracles that have surrounded this entire situation with Dad's stroke.  I am so thankful for many tender mercies that the Lord has seen fit to grant our family at this time.       

These pictures are from yesterday when Dad started to fall asleep.  He was transported across the street for an MRI and worked with the speech therapist that morning, so he was ready for a snooze.  Even so, I didn't see much of his eyes as he kept them shut most of the time.  

I am thankful for the great care Dad is getting at our local hospital.  When Mom, who works at one of the best hospitals around, is impressed with the staff and care Dad is getting, I know he is in good hands.

I am thankful Dad wasn't driving or home alone for the day when he had his stroke.

I am thankful for the power of prayer.  We have already seen the benefit of faithful family and friends prayers for Dad's health and recovery.

I am thankful that Tom and Mom were able to get him to the hospital as fast as they did.

I am thankful for such loving and selfless family.  Thank you Ben and Heather for making the long drive down here to support and comfort my Mom and Dad.  It has meant so much to us all.

I am thankful that Mom is also in good spirits.  I worry about her just as much as Dad.  I know that she is being comforted and strengthened by her faith in Heavenly Father's love for her and Dad.

I am thankful Dad still has his sense of humor.  The part of his brain that was effected by the stroke effects personality which means it could have turned him into a cantankerous, belligerent, old grump.  We are so grateful he is still Dad, if not a little more child-like version.  He is willing to do what the nurses and Docs ask him to, and wants to work hard to get out of that bed for good.  He keeps the staff entertained with his humor, sometimes proving that he doesn't have much inhibition by saying inappropriate things.  ;)

I am thankful for the fast progress Dad is making in his recovery.  He looks so much better than 24 hours after the stroke.  My Man and I went to see him Sunday night, exactly 24 hours after, and it was all I could do to hold back tears.  I wasn't even very good at that.  He could barely open his right eye, he could talk but not very well, he couldn't swallow, and his entire left side was weak and droopy.  It's hard to see a parent slow down, but when it happened so suddenly it really knocked the wind out of me.

I just got back from a quick visit to the hospital on Dad's 3rd day after the stroke and he looks so good.  I walked in to find Dad sitting up and eating!  His meals are blended up hospital food and thickened liquid, but he can swallow better and started his first day back on food.  The best part about seeing Dad today was that he had both eyes wide open and was watching Fox News, his favorite.  Mom said he walked down the hall with the help of a walker, and has been working hard on exercises to strengthen his facial muscles.  He wants to get out of that hospital room SO badly.  Every time I go see him he talks about how he needs to get back to work because they need him.  His attitude is positive and the progress he is making is so encouraging.  We are praying that he can make a quick recovery and keep the motivation to improve his health.

My chillies made Grandpa cute cards on Sunday that we took over that night.  He could barely hold them and didn't open his eyes at all to look at them.  Today we took another picture on Mom's camera where Dad is holding the pictures and trying his best to smile, eyes wide open.  Thank heaven for small miracles.  I know that our Heavenly Father is watching over Dad and our family.  I have realized in these short 3 days that this is a learning and growing experience for all of us, not just Dad.

When we visited on Sunday, Dad said the Doc asked him if he got his wife anything for Valentine's Day.  Dad said he planned on picking up a box of See's chocolates and maybe flowers on his way home from work on Monday.  In his mind he was going to work the next day.  Monday morning we went to my Man's office to put things back together after painting all Saturday.  I had to stop at the See's right by his office to get Dad that box of soft centers he was going to buy Mom.  When I took Mom lunch at the hospital that afternoon, I gave Dad the box of chocolates to give to Mom.  He said, "that's okay, I'm going to get some tomorrow after work."  I said, "Dad, it is tomorrow and I picked them up for you to save you a trip."  The rest of my stay he kept asking to have a chocolate even though we told him over and over that he couldn't eat until he passed his swallow test.  "Yeah, I will," he replied.  Before I left I leaned over his bed to say goodbye when he asked, "you have that candy?"  "You mean the chocolates, Dad?"  "Yeah, crack open that box.  Let's have some chocolate."  As you can see, his brain is still recovering.  ;)

Nightmare

I have two reoccurring nightmares since being married twelve years ago.  Actually, more like eleven years ago, right before our first born came to live with us.  The first nightmare that I can't seem to escape is some sort of home invasion.  A burly man attacks me while I'm alone at home and I can't get help, or someone barges in the house while I'm alone with the kids.  It creeps me out just thinking about it mostly awake.  My second nightmare, to which I have woken up crying a couple times, is being jolted with the news that my Dad has suffered a catastrophic health crisis like a heart attack and died.  I dreamt these vivid, horrible dreams mostly when I was pregnant, but tonight one of them almost came true.

My Man called me as I was taking a breather at Walmart.  My shopping cart held heart chocolates for the kids to attach to their Valentine's, and I was lazily browsing my way up to the cash register.  He hastily asked if I'd talked to my brother, and that my Dad was at the hospital being checked over because he collapsed at home.  I have believed my dearest Dad's health to be fragile for years, and we all beg him to take better care of himself.  It looks as though he has suffered a stroke, but we don't know the extent yet.  I hope and pray that all is as well as it can possibly be after such an occurrence.

I'm trying to direct all my positive thoughts and prayers to Dad's recovery, but there is part of my personality that won't shut off the negative thoughts.  I've got 31 flavors of what happens next churning around in my head and not many of them are good.  I just saw both my parents today, and mentioned to Mom that the new diet change my Man and I have done feels great and could really help Dad.  I'm not ready to lose a parent.  I'm sure no one really is, so I am praying with all my heart and mind (conscious and subconscious) that Dad recovers and finds the motivation to work his way back to health.  I'm here to help with salad in hand!